Happy Valentine’s Day!
We celebrate this day through various expressions of love - cards, excessive amounts of sugar, flowers, and special dinners.
And since this day celebrates our love for others, today I want to invite you to celebrate your love for YOU,.
Whether you’re your own biggest fan, your harshest critic, or anywhere in between - building, nurturing and tending to your relationship with yourself is a life-long process.
It’s the most important relationship you’ll ever have.
How you relate to yourself from moment to moment directly affects and shapes how you see everything else in your life - including all your other relationships, experiences, and events.
Your relationship to yourself is the filter through which you look out into the world.
How do you speak to yourself?
How much attention do you pay to you needs, wants and desires?
What do you allow and tolerate from others in terms of emotions and behaviors?
Diving in deeper in to each of theses questions is a big self-discovery journey unto itself.Today I wanted to dive deeper and offer an exercise to support you with
your Self-talk.
The foundation of the way we relate to ourselves is based on the thoughts and beliefs we hold, and this is most expressed in the way we talk to ourselves.
Our self-talk is the key to understanding our thoughts and deeper subconscious beliefs, and helps you become aware of the lens through which you see the world.
.The reason why changing our self-talk often requires conscious work, is because most of the time we are not even aware of the things we say to ourselves.
Here’s an exercise to start bringing some awareness, and support you in making changes in how you speak, feel and relate to yourself.
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Self-talk Tracking Exercise:
1. For the next week commit to noticing and tracking the thoughts that come up in relation to yourself. Notice the words you use. Is there any negative, harsh, language? Any judgment, blaming, regret, comparison, or self-criticism? Write these down In a journal at the end of a day, or on your Notes app, as you go about your day.
2. At the end of the week notice what shows up. What are the dominant thoughts, judgements and beliefs that you notice. Write them down.
3. Which of these do you think have the most negative charge and are most detrimental to your well-being, confidence, self-empathy? Which ones keep you at odds of who you want to be,?
4. Commit to intentionally inserting thoughts and sentences in your self-talk that are compassionate, uplifting, supportive and loving throughout your day - think of these as your Self-Talk 2.0 and write them down.
Make it a must to acknowledge, compliment and celebrate yourself as often as possible. You CANNOT overdo this!
5. Until this becomes a habit decide at what point through your day you’ll intentionally inserting your new Self-Talk. Here are some ways to do this:
Create reminders to help you integrate these thoughts - you can set an alarm or reminder on your phone;
Create cues - use actions or objects as a cue for you to insert your practice your new Self-Talk- you can do it every time you go through a door, or any time you see a mirror, or any cue that would help you build this into your environment.
Try this for at least 4 weeks in a row to see a significant shift,
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Let me know how it goes - I'd love to hear your thoughts.
What are you doing to celebrate YOURSELF today?
Sending you so much love,
💌 Stani
P.S. If this resonates and you'd like to explore how to create an intentional, fulfilling and joyful life and career, I wanted to let you know there's 1 (one) available Complimentary Coaching Session left from my February giveaway- book yours HERE !
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